Difference between revisions of "HomeARC ML 3202"
| [unchecked revision] | [quality revision] |
(testing bot) |
m (recat) |
||
| Line 269: | Line 269: | ||
</div> | </div> | ||
| − | [[Category:HomeARC]] | + | [[Category:HomeARC ML 3001-3218]] |
Latest revision as of 01:23, 28 July 2006
Living the Lord's Law of Love!--Pt.2 Maria #448 CM 3202 3/98
--How the Law of Love applies to every aspect of your life; why sexual sharing; what if everyone's "needs" seem to be filled; good hurt versus bad hurt; when sharing is not a sacrifice
By Maria
Required Reading. For Voting Members Only
Table of Contents
Sacrificial Love Is the Foundation of the Law of Love
Practical Applications
Dad on the Sexual Side of the Law of Love
Living the Law of Love Requires the Supernatural Love of God!
Living the Law of Love in All These Ways Brings Unity!
A Note to Senior Teens
The Law of Love Is a Gift, a Treasure!
Why Live the Law of Love Fully Now?
Why Sexual Sharing?
What About Situations Where Everyone's Needs Seem to Be Filled?
Living the Law of Love Fully Supplies More than Just Sex!
What If It Hurts to Share?--Good Hurt vs. Bad Hurt!
When Sharing Is Not a Sacrifice
({\ul \i Note}: All references to sexual sharing in this GN are only to be applied according to the guidelines in the Charter. Some phrases or sentences are underlined in this Letter to facilitate easy review of some of the key points that are included from Dad's earlier writings.)
Dear Family,
1. I love you! In the first part of this series I explained the basics of the Law of Love--that it is meant to govern all of our actions, including sexual activity. You also read a summary of the Scriptural basis for it, which made it clear that we are free from all other Biblical laws through Jesus' Law of Love. Even adultery does not exist for us if our actions are done in love. I also included a reminder that, because we are imperfect human beings, the Lord has put a few restrictions in place via the Love Charter to keep us from unloving actions which would harm others or ourselves.
2. Now let's move on into further explanation of the Lord's wonderful Law of Love. I again want to remind you that the audience of this GN is very broad--from senior teens to older adults, those who are married and those who are single, those who are jealous and those who are not. If some of the more specific counsel doesn't seem to apply to your personal situation due to the fact that either you're not married, not going steady with someone, not prone to jealousy, etc., the points being put forth can still be interesting and educational, and what you don't personally need today you might very much need in the future, so please read this GN in full!
Sacrificial Love Is the Foundation of the Law of Love
3. In order to truly live the totality of Jesus' only law and live together in loving harmony and partake of the freedom of sexual sharing, it's imperative that we all grasp the essence of it, that we understand the heart and spirit of the Law of Love. I want to share more from Dad's Letters, so you can hear what he originally had to say about these things, in the hopes that you will be reminded of the loving spirit in which Dad presented the Law of Love and the sexual freedoms allowed within it. These quotes will probably be of special interest to you senior teens who are just now learning about the meaning of the Law of Love.
4. As you read these quotes, remember that Dad wasn't only talking about sex and a sexual need, he was also talking about the other needs that people have, such as the need for friendship, understanding, support, respect, and the need to be listened to and to feel needed and important. Please apply the following counsel to all aspects of your service to the Lord and others, and remember, as I brought out in Part 1 of this series, that living the Law of Love fully is the basis for realizing all our goals for 1998.
5. Here are several quotes from Dad on the sacrificial love of God:
6. Let me emphasize here that the preeminent requisite for anyone in the Revolution must be the same driving passion which motivated the Apostle Paul and all the Apostles and all the martyrs and every great man or woman of God!--In fact, that irresistible compassion which should motivate every child of God in everything you do, everything you say, everywhere you go, with everybody, and which that great fanatical Apostle summed up in these few famous and ringing words which have cried out from the heart of every true Christian in every true good deed he has ever done, and for which indeed he is willing to die: "The love of Christ constraineth us!" (2Cor.5:14).
7. "Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another." "This commandment have we from Him, that he who loveth God love his brother also." "By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God, and keep His commandments." "This is My commandment, that ye love one another, as I have loved you" (1Jn.4:11,21; 1Jn.5:2; Jn.15:12).
8. "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son." "Hereby perceive we the love of God: because He laid down His life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren." "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." "Love one another as I have loved you. [DELETED] By this shall all men know that ye are My disciples" (Jn.3:16; 1Jn.3:16; Jn.15:13; Jn.13:34,35). (ML #151:46-49).
9. If we have real love, we can't face a needy situation without doing something about it. We can't just pass by the poor man on the road to Jericho! We must take action like the Samaritan did! (See Luk.10:25-37.) The Church System today says, "Oh, I'm so sorry, how sad!" But compassion must be put into action! That's the difference between pity and compassion: Pity just feels sorry; compassion does something about it!
10. We must demonstrate our faith by our works, and love can seldom be proven without tangible manifestation in action. To say you love someone and yet not try to help them physically in whatever way they may need--food, clothing, shelter, and so on--this is not love! True, the need for real love is a spiritual need, but it must be manifested physically in works--"faith which worketh by love!" (Gal.5:6).
11. For "whoso hath this world's goods, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him? My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth!" (1Jn.3:17,18).
12. However, we feel that the greatest manifestation of our love is not the mere sharing of our material things and personal possessions, but the sharing of ourselves and our personal services for others, which is our faith, and which results in our works and the sharing of our material possessions. Jesus Himself had nothing material to share with His disciples, only His love and His life, which He gave for them and for us, that we too might have life and love forever!
13. For "greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends!" (Jn.15:13). So we consider that the sharing of ourselves, our love, and our life with others, is the greatest of all sharing and our ultimate goal (ML #607:9-13).
14. "Greater love hath no man than this: that a man lay down his life for his friends." "Therefore we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren." Are you willing to lay down your life--or even your wife--for a starving brother or a sister?
15. Are you willing to give till it hurts, even until it hurts you? Jesus did: He gave His life! God did: He gave His Son! David did: He said, "I will not give unto the Lord of that which hath cost me nothing!" He gave until it hurt! God gives His Wife, the Church, continually in loving service to others! She is constantly engaged in trying to woo and win the world!
16. Are you willing to give that much if needed? Are you willing to suffer to save others?--To offer your life or your wife or be offered as God's Wife or both? (ML #302C:18-20).
17. That's part of love too, to show'm love. The Bible says, if you've got it beside you and your brother needs it, you owe it to him (Jam.2:15,16; Pro.3:27,28). (ML #1941:25).
18. "From him that hath, according to his ability, unto him that hath not, according to his need."--That's the sharing principle of love--and the loving principle of sharing! (ML #833:41).
19. As the Apostle Saint James so clearly states in that passage in his second chapter, the 15th through the 17th verses: "If a brother or sister be naked and destitute of daily food (a necessary physical need like sex), and one of you say unto them, Depart in peace, be ye warmed and filled; notwithstanding ye give them not those things which are needful to the body, what doth it profit? Even so faith, if it hath not works, is dead!" (Jam.2:15-17).
20. In other words, if in the faith of God you really love them, they cannot understand it or believe it unless you really show them by some visible, tangible work or action that puts your words into action and puts your faith into effect and makes it fact and not fiction, a sample not just a sermon! As even Jesus Himself said, "How can you say that you love Me and do not the things that I ask?" (Luk.6:46). (ML #502:21-23).
21. The first law is the law of love--unselfish love--love for Him and others. If you will obey that one and give that love which is His and their due, so shall you also receive. "For with what measure ye mete unto other men's bosoms, so shall they also mete unto your bosom" (Luk.6:38). (ML #250:44).
22. {\b \i (Mama:) }As you can see, Dad was clearly trying to make the point that we should walk in love in all that we do, that love should be the main motivating factor in our every action, and that our love should be manifested in tangible loving deeds which help to supply the needs of others. Dad was saying that when we see someone with a need, it is our duty, in love, to help supply that need. If we don't, how can God's love dwell in us? (See 1Jn.3:17,18.)
Practical Applications
23. When we see children in our Homes who need a father figure, or a single parent who needs help, or a troubled teen in need of a friend, or a large family who could use a hand with the kids, or someone who is overworked and needs rest, or a sick person who needs care, a lonely person who needs friendship, and, yes, someone who needs some sexual fellowship, we are bound by the law--the Law of Love--to do something about it. As Dad said, "The greatest manifestation of our love is not the mere sharing of our material things and personal possessions, but the sharing of ourselves and our personal services for others" (ML #607:12).
24. When you help that needy child or parent or overworked, sick, lonely or needy person, you are giving yourself to them in love; you are fulfilling Jesus' Law of Love. If you were sick or overworked, if you needed help with your children, if you needed some friendship or loving sex, wouldn't you want someone to give you the help you needed? "All things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets" (Mat.7:12).
25. The essence of the Law of Love, dear ones, is having enough love to do to others what you would want them to do to you; to have enough love to help those in need, whatever the need, just as you would want them to help you in your need; to put the needs of others above your own, even when it's a sacrifice for you to do so. That's love.
26. Try to remember this important principle of the Law of Love as you go about your day. If you see someone who needs help preparing lunch because they got a late start, pitch in to help for a few minutes. That's love. When you're getting ready to go witnessing and you see that your partner isn't ready because an unexpected phone call came that delayed him, instead of getting uptight, help him fold his lit and prepare his sandwiches for lunch. That's love.
27. When you know that someone is really battling, why not offer to help out with some of their home chores or duties so they can get some extra Word time? That's love. If you know someone is feeling left out, having battles because someone they were particularly close to moved on to another field, why not go out of your way to ask that person to go for a walk or listen to some music together or read some Word? That's love.
28. If one of the guys is a crummy basketball player, but he really likes to play--instead of making him feel embarrassed, or like a weight or a handicap on your team, try to encourage him, teach him, and praise him when he does well. That's love! When you're super-tired and looking forward to going to bed, but you see someone that you know is just as tired as you putting away a big pile of dinner dishes, why not lend a helping hand? That's love.
29. If you're planning to spend some time with your girlfriend, but your sister is really lonely and heartbroken because she just broke up with her boyfriend, why not invite her to join you for some fellowship, a snack, some ministry training time, etc. That's love. If your little brother just loves the new FTT but he doesn't have a Walkman, offer to lend him yours for the weekend. That's love.
30. If you as a married couple plan to take your kids on an outing on family day--for example, on a picnic at the park--why not invite a single mom and her kids in your Home or city to join you? She will greatly appreciate the help and fellowship, and will see the "One Wife" vision in action. That's love.
31. As Dad said, "'Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.' If you love your neighbor as yourself, you'll put yourself in his place, and wonder how you would feel if you were there, and wonder what you would want and need to have fulfilled, amen?" (ML #648:53,54). This is what the Law of Love is all about--giving love, in deed and in truth, to those in need. That is why the Law of Love is the cornerstone of our Family, the basis of our whole way of life. And that is why when we get away from living the Law of Love, we have problems!
Dad on the Sexual Side of the Law of Love
32. Dad's introduction of sexual sharing in the Family was a move of the Spirit that was based on love for others, sacrifice and compassion. Dad's teaching us about the Law of Love was not just related to FFing and our witness to the world; he also had a desire to make sure everyone in the Family had their needs met. Dad had a heart for the many faithful missionaries in the Family who had given their all to serve the Lord, and he wanted to be sure they had everything they needed to be happy and fulfilled, as much as possible.
33. Here are a few quotes that are more specific about the sexual aspect of the Law of Love. I hope your reviewing these will remind you of the sweet, loving, caring attitudes that motivated Dad in his teaching us about this wonderful freedom in the spirit and the flesh.
34. Jesus didn't go halfway to the cross for you, or almost all the way, but He went all the way and gave all His life for you! How much are you willing to give for others?
35. Jesus fulfilled John 3:16. Have you fulfilled 1John 3:16?--"Hereby perceive we the love of God, because He laid down His life for us: and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren." "For inasmuch as ye have done it unto the least of these My brethren, ye have done it unto Me" (Mat.25:40).
36. Would you do it for Jesus? Then why not for others? "If a brother or sister be naked and destitute of daily food (including sex?) and one of you say unto them, Depart in peace, be ye warmed and filled; notwithstanding ye give them not those things which are needful to the body (sex?), what doth it profit?" (James 2:15,16). Can you truly love others "without partiality" (James 3:17), or do you only give selfishly to those from whom you only selfishly wish to receive? (ML #501:57-60).
37. If you really love somebody, you want them to be happy. That's why we husbands can even be willing to share our wives, and our wives be willing to share their husbands, because they do it unselfishly, sacrificially, in love, for someone else's sake who needs it. This is real love; this is the highest form of love. (ML #648:23, 24).
38. Jesus gave His body even for the unsaved! Surely you should be willing to give yourself at least to each other! Have you been withholding yourself, your flesh, from a brother or sister?--Or even from your own mate? Such selfishness is absolutely unscriptural! (See Acts 2:44; 4:32; 1Cor.7:5; Jam.2:15,16, etc.) Love sacrifices the flesh for others! How long has it been since you've given your body to someone, a brother or sister? (ML #781:87,86).
Living the Law of Love Requires the Supernatural Love of God!
39. {\b \i (Mama:) }It's no easy task to live Jesus' commandments of love. To love the Lord with all our heart, soul, and mind, to love others as ourselves, and to lay down our lives for the brethren, all require living a life of self-sacrifice. It means putting Jesus first, others next, and ourselves last. Doing so goes against the natural man, against human nature. To have this kind of love, the love that causes you to lay down your life for your brethren, which causes you to die daily through dying to yourself and living for others, requires the supernatural love of God. Dad made this point clear when he said:
40. Jesus' law is much stricter [EDITED: "than the Mosaic law"], much more difficult to keep--in fact, impossible! If the old Law was impossible, Jesus' Law is even more impossible! That's why He says, "Without Me, ye can do nothing!" (Jn.15:5). But He also says that we "can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth us" (Phil.4:13). For "His grace is sufficient for us, His strength is made perfect in our weakness!" (2Cor.12:9).
41. You can't possibly keep His Law of Love unless you're saved and you have Jesus in your heart, the Spirit of God's love within you, to give you the power and the strength to love others more than you love yourself (ML #1968:35,36).
42. {\b \i (Mama:) }Living the Law of Love means consistently, sacrificially thinking of others and serving them. That's a tall order! It's so easy to be lazy, selfish, and self-centered; most of us are that way naturally. Our first reactions are usually about ourselves, what we want, what will make us happy. But if we ask the Lord to help us and we put forth a genuine effort, we can develop new habits and reactions, which, with time, will help us to become more loving, caring, sacrificial individuals.
43. The Lord understands that we don't naturally have enough love to live in the loving manner that He's asking us to, but as you'll see in the following message, that's no excuse. Just because we can't do it doesn't mean He doesn't expect us to, because He will do it for us and through us! He's promised that He can give us the love we need, that He will pour His love through us and make us new creatures!
44. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:) }What I ask of My children is a miracle--I ask for outgoing, sacrificial love. It's the nature of man to be self-preserving, self-seeking, self-satisfying. It's the nature of man to put his own needs and survival above others. But that is the way of the men of this world who know Me not. My children have a great advantage because I've broken those natural circuits. I've cut those wires and I've rewired their minds and hearts to do My bidding, which is to love others. What a marvelous testimony this is!
45. When I was with My disciples I said, "By this shall all men know that you are My disciples, if you have love one for another." In that day, this love was a great testimony; it drew much attention and caused a mighty widening of the eyes. But how much more so is this love a miracle in this day and age when people are completely consumed with themselves, their own wants, needs and desires. People have closed themselves off from loving sacrificially. Even marriages no longer have their foundation in unselfish love. There is such darkness, such misery!
46. But this lack of love only serves to make the love of My children shine more brightly! It's as a beacon of love, direction, miracles, power, strength! People cannot deny that such love is out of this world. They ask, "Where do you get such love? How can you live together? How do you do it?" Ah, such satisfaction it brings Me when My children are such a testimony of My love!
47. In this day and age there is an even greater need for love, because the hearts of men have grown terribly cold and hard. They are no longer sensitive to the gentle reflection of My Spirit--they need strong blasts of the red-hot, fiery, blazing power of My love in action! Only then, when it's as a huge, brilliant bonfire in their midst, will they notice, see and believe. For this reason I have set a challenge before the children of David to love more deeply, more sacrificially, more impartially.
48. I know this is far above your natural ability. It's out of your reach to find such love on your own. If you try to do this in your own strength, the arm of the flesh, you'll be disappointed, frustrated, and tire of such labor. But if you call out to Me, simply asking Me for the love you need, and are then willing to put that love into action by faith, I will give you My love in such tremendous volume and power that you will know you have witnessed a miracle!
49. It takes desperate prayer, a believing spirit, and a willing mind and heart. Then follow this with many small steps of unselfish love, and you will become a new creature. You will think of others, have more concern, and feel for others' needs more readily. You'll be willing to give up your own plans and ideas to care for the weak.
50. Love is action, love is doing, love is outgoing concern. But all of this must come from My hand if it is to last. I have such love for you! I'm waiting with a flood of love to pour out upon the children of David, if you will but ask, seek Me with desperate hearts, believe that this is possible, and then be willing to be made willing, available, sensitive lovers of others.
51. I am the God of miracles, and I will give you this miracle of love. I want to give you this new anointing of love, which is synonymous with My power, My face, My person. I am Love, and you can have more of Me than you've ever had before. Ask and you will receive! (End of message from Jesus.)
52. {\b \i (Mama:) }Remember, the Lord will give you the strength, the grace, and the power to give of yourself to others, to put the needs of others before your own, if you ask Him, if you let Him fill you with His Spirit, if you give your life to Him. You can't do it, but Jesus can! And He will, if you let Him!
Living the Law of Love in All These Ways Brings Unity!
53. As the Lord said in the keynote to this year's Birthday Feast: "As you give of yourselves, as you sacrifice your time, your strength, or your loved ones for the needs of others, you are rewarded with unity" (ML #3158:55).
54. When you give of yourself or your loved one, the Lord gives to you. In the same Letter He goes on to say:
55. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:)} 'When you're willing to give of yourself, to be a friend, a companion, a lover; when you're willing to take your time to talk to someone who's lonely, or to make someone feel needed and important--all of this brings with it a certain satisfaction and reward of spirit.
56. When you give in this way, even though it may initially be a sacrifice and it may hurt, it's not long before you see the rewards, and it becomes so obvious to you that you did the right thing. You can feel My love in your heart and you have a sense of accomplishment, a sense of fulfillment, a joy and satisfaction in knowing that you made somebody's day brighter, you helped to lighten their load, you helped them not to give up.
57. Through performing these little acts of love and unselfishness to bring unity, you are blessed personally with happiness that can't be taken away. It's not fleeting or dependent upon the circumstances, but it's a gift that I give you--the happiness of knowing that you have been a blessing to someone in need. (End of message from Jesus.) (ML #3158:59,60).
58. {\b \i (Mama:) }Through the sacrificial giving of yourself to others, you personally receive God's blessing. But on top of that, you and others in your Home receive God's power! I'll continue to quote from that very powerful message from the Lord from the keynote to the Feast:
59. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:) }Unity is the power of God! Unity is not just a manifestation of God or a reward of God or a blessing of God, but unity is the power of God! The greater the unity, the greater the power. If you would be powerful, My people--a powerful witness, a powerful testimony, a financial power--then you must have unity. For these other blessings of God--provision, protection, supply, fruitfulness--will be given from My hand in direct proportion to your unity. (End of message from Jesus.) (ML #3158:62).
60. {\b \i (Mama:) }To receive these blessings, God's power, it's imperative that we have unity. Living the Law of Love in its entirety, which includes sexual sharing, helps to bring about this unity, and thus also helps to bring into our lives, relationships and Homes the blessings and power of God.
A Note to Senior Teens
61. Now I want to go on to the sexual side of the Law of Love. Before talking in depth about sexual sharing, I want to clarify to you senior teens that I'm not by any means pressuring you to share sexually. For more on this, you can reread GN 649, but I'll include an excerpt of a prophecy from that GN. This may also apply to some of you younger new disciples who have recently joined, especially in countries with more conservative cultures. You may be in the same boat as our Family-born senior teens as far as your lack of experience with sex, even though you may be several years older than them. So in some cases, this prophecy would also apply to you.
62. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:)} They [EDITED: "the senior teens"] stand before the great, mighty, wide ocean of My Law of Love, and there are those who would just put their toe in, and there are those who would wade out ever so carefully, and there are those who would dive in! For there are those who are at different levels, and each one must have his or her choice. They must not be forced, and they must not succumb to peer pressure or the desires of others, but each one must walk according to his own faith.
63. For without faith it is sin. Each one must live this Law of Love according to his or her own faith, for only in this will they be able to experience and feel the warmth of love that I want them to feel.
64. Therefore guide them and shepherd them step by step and slowly, that each one may operate according to his or her own faith, and that none be forced and none be embarrassed. (End of message from Jesus.) ("The Law of Love and Senior Teens," Peter #81:17-19).
65. {\b \i (Mama:) }As I go on to talk more about the need for sexual sharing, this will be very interesting material for you senior teens. Some of it will apply to you and some of it won't. How much you choose to live the sexual side of the Law of Love, as is brought out in the above message from the Lord, depends on your own faith, experience and leading. Ideally, I would have liked to write several series of Letters about the Law of Love, addressing the different age groups from senior teens on up. But for lack of time and strength to do so, I've had to resort to addressing all age groups at once. It's up to you, therefore, to prayerfully apply this counsel.
The Law of Love Is a Gift, a Treasure!
66. It's clear from the Scripture and from what Dad has taught that we are to live the Law of Love to the full. Like all other Christians, the Lord expects us to love our neighbors as ourselves, to do loving deeds of kindness, and to help one another. However, because the Lord has called us to be His fully dedicated, strong disciples, because He has made us the children of David, and because of the great amount of truth He has given us, He expects us to live the Law of Love to the full. On this subject, here is an excerpt of a message from the Lord:
67. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:) }My Family, My children of David, have been blessed with the Law of Love. They've been blessed with deep truths of My Spirit and a great knowledge of My spiritual principles and how they operate. They've been blessed with an understanding of how I work, how I bless, how I reward giving, unselfishness, and sacrifice. Therefore you, My Family, are accountable to live My Law of Love, to fulfill the obligation of love, to live in love and kindness one toward another. Be assured that these principles of My Word are true, and that I will bless love, giving, and faith; and that I will not reward selfishness. (End of message from Jesus.)
68. {\b \i (Mama:) }As was explained earlier, we, the Family, are able to partake of sexual freedoms within the Law of Love that few other Christians are able to. Because of our faith, our knowledge of the Word, and the revelation the Lord gave to Dad on this matter, we are able to share sexually with one another without sin, providing it is in accordance with the principles of the Law of Love and the guidelines put forth in the Love Charter.
69. Most Christians would disagree with us on this point. They feel that sex with another person outside of marriage is a sin. They also feel that for a married person to have sex with someone other than their spouse is sin. They're right!--It is sin for them, because they don't have the faith for it; they don't believe that they are free from the bondage of the Mosaic Law. But for us it's not sin, because we know from the Word that we are free from the Mosaic Law through the Lord's Law of Love.
70. The understanding of the fullness of the Law of Love and the freedom that it gives us is a special gift that the Lord has given to the Family. It has not been revealed to your average, everyday Christian. It's possible that you older adults have grown quite familiar with the truth of the Law of Love as we know it, and it might not seem like such a big deal to you anymore. You might not have doubts or questions about the Scriptural basis for it, but it may have been years since it's been an active part of your life. And you young ones, especially you senior teens, might be somewhat in the dark about the Law of Love, especially the sexual sharing part.
71. Not understanding the full meaning of the Law of Love, nor the Scriptural basis for it, and not having seen a good example of sexual sharing in recent years might have left you young people feeling rather confused, and certainly not looking at the truth of the Law of Love as some special gift from the Lord, something of great value to be treasured. And you older adults also may no longer see the Law of Love as the special gift that it is, perhaps because of hurts you experienced in the past when the Law of Love was not lived as the Lord and Dad had expected it to be, or because of years having gone by since you have actively and fully participated in it.
72. I want to share a portion of a prophecy with you that I hope will rekindle the respect of you of the older generation for the Law of Love, and help you younger ones have a desire to understand it better.
73. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:) }Behold the beautiful treasure that I have given unto the children of David: treasure and riches that have never been known, this treasure of the Law of Love! Such freedom and such love the world has never known! Such beauty in My eyes--this Law of Love!
74. {\b \i (Mama:) }How highly the Lord values His Law of Love! In what beautiful terms He describes it! Do you get what He's saying here? This is a unique treasure He's given to us!! It's amazing that He would trust us with this wonderful treasure--us, His Endtime children! How much we should be valuing this gift! How much we should be thanking Him for it and doing all we can every day to show our appreciation to Him for it as we try to understand it and put it into practice!
75. {\b \i (Jesus continues:)} I would that you would glory in this Law of Love, that you would be proud of this Law of Love, that you would not only speak of it, but that you would practice it and live it and enjoy it to the full! For this Law of Love is the very essence of the freedom of My Spirit, and the abundance of My Love that I have given to the children of David--such beauty and such love and such freedom, such as the world has never seen! (End of message from Jesus.)
76. {\b \i (Mama:) }The Lord says the Law of Love is something to be proud of, to talk about, to practice, and to enjoy! He calls it "the very essence of the freedom of My Spirit." What a precious gift He's delivered into our hands, one which we should use and be thankful for. Lord help us all to have the right attitude about it.
77. In the following message, the Lord gives further insight into the special blessing and gift He has given us in the freedoms we have through the Law of Love.
78. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:)} I have given the total freedom of the Law of Love to the children of David for several reasons: They have given their all to Me and have wholeheartedly embraced the Words of David. They have been willing to give to the limit, and have let Me break their hearts for the needs of others. Thus I have been able to purge from the children of David the selfishness and self-righteousness that permeates the church system. When I compare the selfishness and self-righteousness of the children of David to My children in the church, it's as if you have none. You are so advanced in your yieldedness, it's as if the selfishness and self-righteousness did not exist. I know it's there, but in My love for you, as My brides, I see it not when I know you're trying the best you can.
79. The truth of the Law of Love could be available to others if they had the faith, but except for a very few exceptions, they don't. And the reason they don't have the faith is because they don't have or believe the Words of David. Don't you see, My precious ones?--The key to this total freedom is in the Word! You have faith because you have the Word--the hot, radical Word from Heaven!
80. This total freedom and total abandonment in love is a special gift that is reserved for you who have given your all to Me. You've surrendered your pride, your reputation, your mate or lover, the traditional values of this world and even the church system, because you wanted all that I have to give you. Such yieldedness, such faith in the Words of David, has brought Me great joy. And in return I give you something of inestimable value--the full truth of My Law of Love.
81. Revel in this truth, in this love, for it is My gift of love to you, My faithful children of David. Pity those who could have such love, such freedom, such expression of My Spirit in all aspects of their lives, but who don't, for their lack of faith and dedication to Me. Let not those who seek to keep the old Law intimidate you, for they are the ones in darkness and in bondage. They are the ones who hold on to their own righteousness, who have not given themselves to Me as you have. They have blocked the flow of My Spirit. They have cut themselves off because they say, "Thus far and no further."
82. But you, My precious hot brides, say, "Give me more, give me more!" And therefore I do! I give you more of the breathtaking, life-giving freedom of My love than anyone has had before! Just as you fight to let no man steal your crown, fight to let no man steal this freedom which is your due, your reward, My special gift to you! (End of message from Jesus.)
Why Live the Law of Love Fully Now?
83. For various reasons, some of you might not feel that the sexual side of the Law of Love is such a great gift. I understand these feelings. To share sexually adds a dimension to your life that requires a great deal of sacrifice. It's possible that you especially feel this way if you've suffered in some way when trying to share either yourself or your mate with someone else. A lot of the difficulty stems from jealousy.
84. You might wonder, "Why is it necessary to live the sexual side of the Law of Love? What are the benefits? Is it worth the trouble, the tests, the trials, the sacrifice? Things are going pretty well in the Family right now. We're making progress, pioneering, opening lots of new Homes, winning new disciples, etc., so why do we have to rock the boat with all this talk about living the Law of Love fully, which includes sexual sharing?"
85. I don't blame you for feeling that way. That's natural, especially if you're a person who battles jealousy, or if you're a young person who doesn't really see the purpose of all this Law of Love stuff. There's nothing wrong with wanting to know why the Lord wants us to do something or move in a certain direction. In fact, when something is difficult and costs you a lot, it really helps to know what the big picture is and what good will come from such sacrifice. It's nice to sometimes know, "What's in it for me?" Even Jesus "endured the cross" for the sake of the "joy that was set before Him" (Heb.12:2).
86. In the next part of this GN, I'll explore some of the reasons why the Lord has given us this gift of love, what the benefits are of using it for His glory, and why He's interested in seeing us live the Law of Love more fully now, when there were a few years where it definitely seemed to be "on the back burner." But before we get into that, I first want to address the question of why in recent years did so many get so far away from living the sexual side of the Law of Love?
87. I believe there are a number of reasons why many have minimized their sexual sharing. There are practical reasons, such as the move to smaller Homes, which means smaller housing. It is often difficult to find a comfortable private place to have a date with someone. Also, many parents are now more fully occupied with the care of their children and many other Home duties than they were during the big combo days, so finding the extra time to share can be quite a feat.
88. Another reason is because of the persecution we suffered several years ago. The persecution brought a certain element of fear with it. This fear caused a further shift towards sexual conservatism within the Family. It's not that the Family was sexually wild before the persecution. To the contrary, with so much going on in the schooling and training of our young people at that time, the sexual activity in our Homes was already cooling off significantly.
89. Plus, many of you might recall that several Letters and FSM articles were published around the time of the teen camps that de-emphasized relationships. There were also more strict and conservative rules in place in the Family regarding the sexual sharing amongst young people. The Lord led in this direction at that time because He knew we needed to concentrate on learning other important lessons and training our young people. I would say that these factors also contributed to the decline of sharing in the years that followed.
90. Also, some people pulled back from sharing because they had been hurt somehow in the past. The sharing they had experienced in their personal life or marriage or observed in their Home hadn't always been handled lovingly and had caused people to get hurt. Therefore they either felt it wasn't worth the risk or the trouble, or their heart and spirit had been wounded through their battles, so they felt they needed a time of reprieve and therefore pulled back from sharing.
91. Over the past few years there have been many changes and new moves of the Spirit. Dad went to be with the Lord, the Charter was implemented, and the Lord gave us the new weapons of the Spirit. All of these things brought about great change--change which has not come easy for many. I believe the Lord, in His mercy, didn't emphasize the sexual sharing side of the Law of Love up till now because He wanted us to concentrate on growing in these other important areas, without having to work on fully living the Law of Love at the same time. We've made tremendous progress in these areas over these past few years, and now the Lord is asking us to once again grow in this facet of our faith. He had the following to say about it:
92. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:)} In recent years, the years of the new day, the Family as a whole has had to make many major changes. You've learned to be fed deeply from My Word of prophecy. You've learned to live and know the Love Charter. You've learned to adjust to living in smaller Homes and caring for your own children, rather than depending on big institutionalized Homes. You've learned to use the new weapons of hearing from Me in prophecy, praise, and loving Me intimately. The faith of each of you has been tested, and you've been taken through the depths and the heights to purge you, purify you, and make you strong.
93. These past years have been difficult years in many ways--years of testing, years of change, years of growth. They've also been years of progress, years of personal fulfillment and satisfaction. But now I take you to yet another level of learning and growth. I put before you another challenge, as I want you to grow in the area of love. This is yet another "new weapon" that I bestow upon you to help prepare you for the days of war that are to come! (End of message from Jesus.)
94. {\b \i (Mama:) }That's a good answer, isn't it? The Lord is merciful and He realized we couldn't handle everything at once. With so many big changes and revolutions, He knew we could only concentrate on so much at once, and we definitely needed to grow in the other areas He mentioned. Now He's asking us to grow in the area of love.
Why Sexual Sharing?
95. Now that we have that major question answered, let's go on to discuss the reasons why we should partake of the sexual freedom that is part of the Law of Love.
1) To obey the Lord's commandment to love one another.
96. Perhaps the foremost reason to live this aspect of the Law of Love is because the Lord has asked us to. We love the Lord and want to obey Him. He said, "This is My commandment, that you love one another, as I have loved you" (Jn.15:12).
97. He has made it clear through the Word that the full understanding of the Law of Love is a special blessing He's given to us. As He said earlier, "You, My Family, are accountable to live My Law of Love, to fulfill the obligation of love." We are accountable because we know so much truth, thanks to Dad's faith and yieldedness to receive the revelations and instruction the Lord gave him. We have been given so much understanding of the Lord's ways and the Scriptures that we are subject to the spiritual principle of "unto whom much has been given, of the same shall much be required" (Luk.12:48).
98. If the Lord wants us to love one another as He has loved us, then let's just think a moment about how our wonderful Husband loves us. He goes all the way for us. He loves us intimately, completely and unconditionally. And as He has loved us, so should we love one another.
99. Helping those in need is part of love, and when one is in need of sexual love, supplying that need is fulfilling the Lord's commandment to love. We believe in sacrificial love for the sake of our brothers and sisters, and part of that love is sharing sexually, opening our arms of love to each other. If for no other reason, we should share out of obedience to the Lord and His Word, and a desire to please the Lord. "Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these My brethren, ye have done it unto Me" (Mat.25:40).
2) To follow the Lord closely and move forward with the New Wine.
100. Closely related to obeying the Lord is our need to receive and live the New Wine. The Lord is pouring forth His direction abundantly, but it's up to each one of us as to what we'll do with that truth--whether we'll receive it gladly and eagerly obey, or whether we'll hold back.
101. There are various ways to react to the New Wine: You can read it for information but not take time to apply it to yourself. You can read it and agree with it, but never get around to doing anything about it. You can look at it skeptically, analyze it, and then only do the minimum that is required to hold on to your Charter Member status. Or you can be enthusiastic, even if you have to smile through your tears, as you study it, absorb it, and try your best to do what you can to put it into practice.
102. What you do is up to you, of course, but there is plenty of motivation to fully and wholeheartedly embrace and live the New Wine if you'll review what Dad said in "The Year of the Bottom Line":
103. {\b \i (Dad speaking:)} Many of our folks have thought that they could just ride along, or that they would at least go for as long as possible without having to make these changes and implement these sacrificial ways of living in their lives. Well, their time has just about run out! The clock is ticking, the days are counting, and the New Year ushers out the old and rings in the new! [DELETED] This year is going to be a moving year, and like I said, it's going to be a year of getting down to the bottom line, the brass tacks of sacrificial and loving living and giving.
104. It's imperative that people get on board, because all the little chess pieces--each Family member--need to be yielded and willing in order for the Master Chess Player to be able to move them wherever He wants to. In this game of the Last Days, it's not enough to just be passive in the spirit, waiting for the Lord to change you. He'll do the work and the changing, yes, but you need to be desiring it, wanting it, willing, open, and eagerly desiring the Lord's will and the fruits of His Spirit and the New Wine! We're coming down to the home stretch and the ante is being upped! The level of dedication and commitment has been heightened. (End of message from Dad.) (ML #3176:55,56,71,72, GN 781).
105. Please note that Dad says here that we need to be "wanting it, willing, open, and eagerly desiring the Lord's will and the fruits of His Spirit and the New Wine!" This move toward living the Law of Love fully, including sexual sharing, is the Lord's New Wine! Remember, one of the goals for 1998 is to take more time to read, understand, and absorb the New Wine--and I might add, the supremely important next step is to live it!
3) To generate greater unity.
106. Another good reason to share sexually with others is that when you share with others in love, when you have that communion of heart with heart, one of the principal blessings you receive is unity. I already addressed earlier in this Letter, and in Part 1 of this series, our need for unity and how living the Law of Love in general brings unity. Now I want to explain how living the Law of Love fully--including sexual sharing--brings greater unity!
107. Having that intimate contact with one another strengthens our bonds of love with each other. It creates a loving, caring, giving, unselfish atmosphere. It helps us to overlook the faults of others and makes it easier for us to prefer one another in love. This kind of Godly love and sharing creates a wonderful bond of unity and love that very few people in the world have, and for which we're very thankful. This resultant unity, this oneness, this "One Wife" marriage in spirit together, is one of the major reasons for sexual sharing within the Law of Love. In a message on this subject the Lord said:
108. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:) }When you share together in My love, when you join together in flesh and in spirit, it's a marriage not only of bodies but of loyalties, of hearts, of thoughts. This loving is the difference between being just an organization, just a working relationship, just a business deal, and being a marriage in the spirit! It's a uniting, a oneness of My Kingdom, an inseparableness where there are no walls. (End of message from Jesus.)
109. {\b \i (Mama:) }Those are beautiful results that the Lord has promised will blossom in your lives as you reach out and give the Lord's love to one another.
110. Before going further, I want to explain that I realize that there are situations in which, for a variety of reasons, there is no one available for some of you to share sexually with--either you live in a single-family Home, or there is no one of the opposite sex available in your Home or area, or there is no one within your age bracket according to the guidelines of the Charter, etc. If that's your situation, then please don't feel resentful or think that you're missing out on what might look to you like the one and only key element in the unity equation--because that's not the case! The Lord only expects you to do what you can, and if your circumstances prevent sexual sharing, then please concentrate on the many other ways that you can live the Law of Love. The Lord will be very pleased with this and He will reward you with the blessings of unity!
111. Along the same lines, I have heard of cases where one person of a mated couple is quite active in sharing and the other mate isn't, either because there is no one available for him or her to share with, or he or she is in poor health, etc. In those cases, the mate that is not doing the active sharing might think, "Well, living the Law of Love in its entirety might help to bring about unity for my mate and the others that he [EDITED: "or she"] is sharing with, and thus helps to bring into their lives and relationships the power of God. But what about me? I'm left on my own and actually feel left out of this unity which the others are experiencing because of their sharing."
112. This is a natural reaction, and at first you might conclude that you're destined to be left out of the unity and intimacy that sexual sharing generates, if you're not directly involved because the circumstances you're in don't allow you to share much. But here's a good bit of advice from someone who is in that very circumstance and has been for quite a while. She said: "I'm learning that when giving a mate to sharing, you can still be a part of it, if you're giving wholeheartedly and if the Law of Love pervades in the Home. It can help to bring about unity between the women involved, too, even if there are no other males for the female mate to share with. And if the male mate, in this case, is going about it in the right way, it can promote unity overall. If the sharing is done prayerfully and with consideration, and the real spirit of the Law of Love prevails, it can strengthen the bonds of love with the mated ones, the ones doing the actual sharing, a group of three people, or even the body or Home as a whole, and it can create a loving, caring, giving, unselfish atmosphere between everyone involved, more than just between the two individuals who are sharing."
113. When you're sharing your mate with others, even if you don't have the opportunity to share much with others, your sacrifice should help to draw you closer to others as well, through the communication that you have with them as a result of the sharing--working it out to share, touching base beforehand and afterwards, the one who shared with the wife or husband thanking the mate, etc.
114. I imagine that some of you, although you agree with the need for unity, are thinking, "I've seen plenty of cases where sexual sharing has not brought about unity, but instead has caused lots of problems with jealousy, bickering and disunity!" Maybe there's some sharing going on in your Home right now and it's causing someone to be jealous, which has generated some marriage or relationship problems with obvious arguments, hurt feelings, door-slamming, etc.; or possibly the problems are less obvious but there is a lack of communication, people are upset inside and getting resentful, and the interaction between Home members is quite formal and frigid. Maybe these kinds of problems with disunity have even disrupted some aspects of the smooth running of the Home. Or possibly you have seen some marriages that have had serious problems or even broken up, and it looks to you like a lot of the trouble was caused by living the Law of Love.
115. I certainly acknowledge that difficulties come up, and there are problems. I plan to address them in the next GNs in this series, so please don't stop reading or think that I don't know what I'm talking about when I say that living the Law of Love can bring about greater unity. It can, it does, and it should, if handled with a great deal of love, prayer and consideration. Yes, there will be lessons to learn. More guidelines and instruction are needed, many of which will be included in this series, which I believe will help you know better how to make loving, wise decisions. So the point is, if you've seen bad samples of the Law of Love, if you've seen people hurt or things not handled right, don't just give up and say it can't be done. We're all learning and growing. Things will get better, with the Lord's help and our cooperation!
4) To enhance and facilitate our communal living.
116. I believe that another one of the reasons the Lord has given the Family the freedom to share sexually with each other without sin is because we live communally. Living together as we do is no easy task; it requires a great deal of love and understanding to live harmoniously with others. There are difficulties which arise in communal living--we get on each other's nerves, we see things differently, we have different interests and ideas--and if it weren't for our strong bond of love and unity, we'd probably not be able to do the job as well or even be able to continue to live together!
117. In order to make it work, we need to strive to be very caring and have an outgoing love and concern for each other. We need to strive to live in harmony and to break down any barriers and walls that sometimes build up. Having sex with someone can be a real help in breaking down those walls, if you let your nakedness and the humility that results bring you closer in spirit, and if you take the time to communicate what's on your hearts, which will help to renew your fellowship and love for each other. Here are excerpts of messages from the Lord and Dad in which they confirm the power of sexual sharing in bringing hearts together:
118. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:)} Are you having a hard time loving some brother or sister? Are you having a hard time getting along with this person or that person? Maybe you just haven't been loving others enough. Maybe you haven't been spending enough time in the bed of love with those that you can, to help regenerate that love within you.
119. If you'll take that time to love others, if you'll take that time to share your heart, to share your bodies, to share your loved one with another, you'll find love growing within you. You'll find it's easier to love those that cause you difficulty or sometimes rub you the wrong way.
120. Love begets love! The more you love, the more you will love. So don't forget, with God's love you can love anyone. (End of message from Jesus.)
121. {\b \i (Dad speaking:)} Sex is a great leveler! It really breaks down the barriers between people more quickly than almost anything else. In fact, I can't think of anything else that brings people together better than sex. Once you're naked and in bed together, what do you have to hide?--Especially if you're loving the Lord intimately. It kills your pride, but it brings out the best in you. It brings the Spirit of the Lord into your lives and relationship.
122. Then even if you don't have that much time during the course of the week to spend talking or sharing your hearts, the unity and the bond that the Lord has given you through the time that you spend in bed lives on. The sweetness and the love you've shared is like oil that helps to lubricate all the various activities that you're involved in throughout the week, the problems that you have to face, and the decisions that you have to make.
123. Love is the heartbeat of this Revolution! It's the very blood of the body of Christ! And what better way to experience or share and feel that love than in bed in sexual sharing, in the giving of love, in humbling yourself to make love one with another? (End of message from Dad.)
124. {\b \i (Mama:)} Please remember, however, that there will be some people in your Home that you won't have sexual contact with. Men won't have sexual contact with other men, nor will anyone have sexual contact with those outside the age designations laid down in the Charter. But even if you don't have sex with some members of your Home, you can still take extra care to fellowship with them, to avoid cliques. Also, if disunity exists with those people who you cannot share with, you can still work to bring unity through more communication, asking them to forgive you for your failings, having heart-to-heart talk time that's nonsexual, etc.
5) To supply others' sexual needs.
125. An obvious reason for sexual sharing is to help supply the sexual needs of those with whom we live. Of course, sex isn't the only need which we should try to fill under the Law of Love; there are many other needs that our brethren have which we are responsible to try to fill.
126. One of the greatest needs of man is to feel loved. We have a need for companionship, to feel close to others. We have a need for friendship, a need to feel useful, the need to be considered important and like we're contributing something worthwhile. We need to feel appreciated. We need affection. We all have many physical, emotional and spiritual needs, and all of us need to do our best, by God's grace, to help supply those needs for our dear loved ones if we can. As the Bible says, "Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ"--which is the Law of Love (Gal.6:2). Let's talk now about filling another's need for sex.
127. Earlier in this Letter you read very convicting quotes from Dad where he talks about our responsibility before the Lord to take care of our brothers and sisters sexually. I can testify that Dad lived what he preached. He was always concerned that the ones in our Home had what they needed, and that all the men and women were getting sufficient sex. He was always very giving, caring, concerned, and aware of people's needs and feelings.
128. Of course, to care for others sexually is often a sacrifice, and it especially hurts to give the one you love. Giving often hurts. It's not easy. But it's our duty before the Lord to give to those in need, including those who are in need of sex.
129. I can understand how you might be looking at sexual sharing as quite a big test. It might seem like the Lord is expecting a lot of you. But let's put it in a little different perspective. When you consider all that our brothers and sisters in the Family have done for the Lord, all they have forsaken to serve Him full-time, what a blessing they are, and the sacrifices they make on a daily basis to be what the Lord wants them to be, then to give them a little sex once in a while seems like the least we can do to help make their lives happier and reward them for their faithfulness to the Lord, as is brought out in the following message:
130. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:)} Reach out and touch those who are in need and lonely and broken and empty, those who have given their lives for Me, those who have forsaken all and left it all behind. It's a small thing for you to do to repay, to show your appreciation, to manifest My love to these who have given so much. (End of message from Jesus.)
131. {\b \i (Mama:) }You probably don't look at it like that now if you're thinking about some kind of sharing situation that is a sacrifice for you--either giving your loved one to another, or giving yourself to someone you don't have a particular attraction to. I know the Lord understands that it's a struggle, and it takes practice, experience, and stepping out by faith. But the main point He's making in the above message is to impress upon us all that what it costs us to share with someone sexually is a small thing when compared with all that that person has given up for the Lord in order to be His full-time disciple.
132. When you think of all the tests, sacrifices and battles that each Family member has endured, and all that each one has had to forsake in order to join and remain strong in the Family, you can better understand why the Lord would say that to help supply that person's need sexually is the least we can do. When looking at it like that, we see that it's a blessing to be the Lord's love for that person and to help show His gratitude for their willingness to be His soldier.
133. As I mentioned earlier, in the Family survey that was published in "Victory Review '97," it was estimated that 33% of our singles share only once every three to six months, and 25% of them share once a year or less. That means that one out of every four singles is getting almost no sex! If this is by choice for some of you, that's one thing; but if not, then I'm sure you who are in this state can relate to the need that's being expressed here. If you're not in this kind of needy situation, but instead you have regular sexual fellowship, either with friends or a mate, then I ask you to please try to put yourself in the place of those who are in need.
134. As much as I want to see each of you have your sexual needs met, I feel constrained to also mention here that this is not a license for anyone to pressure someone else for sex! There is definite freedom of choice regarding sex in our Family, and no one is to feel forced in any way. To feel the conviction of the Lord's Spirit to share sacrificially with someone in need is one thing, but to feel forced to share with someone you either don't want to share with or don't have the faith to share with, either because of their pleading, their coercing, or their off-color comments is wrong! If you find that you are being pressured in this way, please report it to your shepherds! Sex is to be had only between consenting individuals! To consent, according to The American Heritage Dictionary, means you "give assent [DELETED] to the proposal of another, to agree." The Charter says:
Sex may only occur between consenting partners within the proper age limits as outlined in the {\b \i Offenses Warranting Excommunication.}
If a sister or brother does not want to share sexually with someone, they should not be coerced into doing so. If you wish to have a date with someone, and they do not wish to have a date with you, then you should not try to make them feel that they are not being "sacrificial." Perhaps you need to be more sacrificial by forgoing the date with them. Maybe if you pray and ask the Lord to supply someone to fill your needs rather than trying so hard in the arm of the flesh, you might get better results. (The Charter, Sex and Affection Rules, D.)
For teens (16 and 17), sexual activity is permitted only with consenting partners ages 16 through 20.
You will notice that in the root clause it says "sexual activity is permitted only with consenting partners ages 16 through 20." It is very important to realize that not everyone in your age group is going to want to engage in sexual activity, that some will want to wait until they are older or until they feel more prepared for it. Others will only want to dabble in it, while yet others will want to partake fully. The choice whether to take this step is a very personal and individual choice based on each person's faith. No one should feel pressured one way or the other by anyone. If you are trying to convince someone to have sex with you or to go farther than they want to go, or if you are applying peer pressure in any way, then your actions are unloving and are contrary to the Law of Love. (The Charter, Sex and Affection Rules, F.)
Members may only engage in sexual activities that are mutually agreed upon by both partners, and permitted for their age group. No one should force or in any way coerce a sexual partner to participate in any sexual activity that they do not desire to engage in.
As explained earlier, sexual activities are to occur only if both parties are consenting. This clause covers any specific sexual activities which one partner may not feel comfortable engaging in. For example, if a man particularly likes having a woman perform oral sex on him, but she doesn't like it, the man should not try to badger or in any way try to coerce her to do so.
Simply stated, people should not force or try to coerce their sexual partners to do things that they don't want to do. To do so is unloving and unkind. (The Charter, Sex and Affection Rules, H.)
6) To preserve the Family's usefulness and progress.
135. The Lord is asking us to live the Law of Love fully not just because it will be good for us but because it's necessary--not just necessary to our fruitfulness but to our very survival and progress. If we don't grow in this area we will seriously suffer for it, not only as individuals or Homes, but as a Family overall. The Lord said:
136. ({\b \i Jesus speaking:)} This is a strong test, strong meat, but it is necessary for the survival of the Family, and not only its survival but the Family's progress, their greater usefulness to Me and their ability to continue to use their gifts of being revolutionaries, of being 100% My followers, so that I can use them more mightily! Otherwise, they will slowly begin to gravitate to that which is comfortable, easy, and that which requires less sacrifice and less giving and forsaking of themselves. (End of message from Jesus.)
137. {\b \i (Mama:)} If we want to continue being revolutionaries, 100% followers of the Lord so He can use us more mightily in the future, then we need to move ahead with Him. The Lord wants to keep us on track, dropped out and revolutionary, and He's using this radical message to do just that!
138. You are free to operate according to your faith, and the Lord will not require of you that which you are not able to do. At the same time, however, He wants you to try your best to live the Law of Love in all its aspects. He wants you to see it as your personal responsibility, obligation and duty for the sake of the unity of your Home, for the sake of our worldwide work and reaching the lost, and for the sake of our continued greater usefulness and preparation for the Endtime.
139. The days ahead will be different than the days we know now, and what might not seem so necessary to learn now, or meat that seems too strong or not really necessary right now, will be very needed in the days to come. These are the days of preparation.
140. For many of you, living the Law of Love and learning how to put it into practice in your daily lives with the people you live with will be a hard saying. It will be difficult, and there will be trials, battles and problems. Peter and I are completely aware that this is a test, strong meat. But we in the Family have the high calling of being His Endtime soldiers, and we must cherish that calling, no matter what the cost.
7) Preparation for the Endtime.
141. The Lord is also using this move toward fully living the Law of Love as preparation for our future role in the Endtime, when we'll need even greater unity and understanding of one another.
142. We know things will not continue as they are today. There's going to be great confusion in the world, and great persecution of God's children. Learning lessons of love for one another and how to live together in love is preparation for the future when we'll need, and count on, the strength of our love and unity with each other, as Dad and the Lord clearly point out in the following prophecies:
143. {\b \i (Dad speaking:)} The Family needs the love, the unity and the strength that comes from living the Law of Love. They may not think they need it now, but in the times to come and as the Endtime events unfold, they'll realize very clearly how much they need the unity and strength and love that comes from living the Law of Love. Then they'll be so thankful that they know how to do it, that they've been doing it, that they've been exercising their muscles of faith and giving and sacrifice. (End of message from Dad.)
144. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:)} If you'll give of your life, if you'll give of your love, if you'll give of your body to another, it's going to bring great unity. You'll find such sweet fellowship with your Family. In the days to come you're going to greatly value your fellowship with each other--that closeness, that relationship with your brothers and your sisters--because that's what's going to bring you strength in those days. You're going to be forging such strong bonds that none can break them in the days to come.
145. So do not look lightly upon the Law of Love. Do not look lightly upon this aspect of sharing and giving your heart to another, because it's important. It's teaching you to love another, it's teaching you to give to another, it's teaching you to lay down your life for a brother or a sister. It's going to bring great strength, because it's going to help energize you with the power of love that you will feel from each other. The more you exercise your abilities and powers to love, the more you give love, then the more you receive love, the more filled with love you're going to be, and the stronger you're going to be.
146. You're going to be giants of love! You're going to be so strong in the power of love that no man will be able to resist you. There are great things on the horizon! I'm going to use you in great and wondrous ways, but I'm going to use you through the power of love. Love is what is going to motivate you. Love is what is going to see you through. Love is what is going to help you in the dark and troublous days. (End of message from Jesus.)
147. ({\b \i Mama:) }We don't know the details of what the future holds for each of us, but the Lord is trying to help us see that we'll need a stronger bond of supernatural love between us that will be part of our strength. The Lord has warned us that the unity we have now is not enough. Whatever we will face, either as individuals, small groups or families, or the Family as a whole, the Lord is preparing us now. These are days of preparation for dark, troublesome days ahead, days of war.
148. By the time a platoon of soldiers goes to war, they've been through a lot together. They've been drilled, tested, pushed to the limit--and through all that, they've become strengthened and have become a tightly knit team. I'm sure that unity is one of the most important fruits of their intense basic training.
149. Similarly, these are our days of training. We're learning new maneuvers, new skills, and are being taken to greater heights of self-sacrifice. But the result for us is much the same as what happens with worldly soldiers--we become one. We learn to move together, fight together, care for one another to our own hurt or sacrifice, watch out for each other, and anticipate the attacks of the Enemy. We become one body, one heart, and one mind. We move forward decidedly, courageously, and the result of all this is that we win the war!
8) To be a witness and help prepare for the world of tomorrow.
150. The Lord has told us repeatedly that He uses our radical doctrines--such as our belief in the Law of Love and our practice of it--to keep us, and consequently Him and His Word, in the news. But the Lord is not just getting His message out and giving people a chance to make a choice either to receive or reject the truth. There's more to it than that! In the following message, Dad shows us that He's also starting to prepare for the world of tomorrow, the Millennium, and we have a key role to play!
151. {\b \i (Dad speaking:)} The Lord wants to use the Family to be witnesses of His Law of Love to the world, because in so doing, He's paving the way for the world of tomorrow when He returns to rule the world by His Law of Love. This should be the biggest incentive for our folks to start living the Law of Love right now--knowing that this is how the Lord's gonna rule in the Millennium. He's gonna govern by the Law of Love, because it's His law. How else would you expect Him to rule? And those of His children who are obeying and following and living His Law of Love right now are the ones He's gonna use to help Him reign then! The Lord's giving the Family a head start!
152. God's plan is not going to be stopped! So what our folks need to ask themselves is this: Do you want to be a part of that plan and be at the top of His list--His shining examples to the world to help Him usher in His Kingdom on Earth?--Or would you rather be left behind and have an awful lot of catchin' up to do later? It's time the Family faces their fears about the Law of Love--because like it or not, the Law of Love is going to rule the world of tomorrow! (End of message from Dad.)
153. {\b \i (Mama:)} We in the Family are privileged to have this "head start," even if it does come with a few tests and trials. The Lord knows we can make it, and this vision certainly gives us some added incentive and shows us that it's worth it to exercise our sharing and unselfishness muscles now, so we can be what He wants us to be in the future. Praise the Lord!
What About Situations Where Everyone's Needs Seem to Be Filled?
154. Now I want to address a question that we hear quite frequently. What about situations where there isn't an obvious need? Why do we need to share then?
155. Besides filling a sexual need, sharing fills other needs as well. You could have a Home where everyone pretty much has their sexual needs met, where the married couples make love with their partners and the singles have occasional dates with each other, yet it's possible that this Home can have a closed, cold, stiff atmosphere, with very little affection or closeness between the Home members. In this case, sharing with one another--the couples sharing with other couples as well as with singles, and the singles sharing with each other without partiality--would fill a need, as it could help to bring about a free flow of the Lord's love between them. It could bring about greater unity, help them to get to know one another more intimately, and thus draw them closer together.
156. It may not be that they have a great sexual need, because they each have a regular or semi-regular partner for sex, but there is a need nevertheless--the need for greater closeness which brings unity, the need to be more open and free with one another, to show more affection, to love each other more, to have more of the spirit of love in the Home!
157. In another instance, someone may need to share with others not necessarily because they have a sexual need, but because they have a need to be spiritually ministered to through the love the Lord can give them through the person they're having sex with. They may be starving spiritually for the true affection of the Lord's Spirit. As Dad said in prophecy:
158. {\b \i (Dad speaking:)} Sex is not just a need of the flesh, nor is it a weakness of the flesh--it's one of the most powerful, effective, wonderful, thrilling ways that you can feel and experience the ecstasies of the Spirit of God, His love! When you're loving each other with His love, and especially when you're loving Him together as your Husband, you can hardly beat the thrill, the charge, the explosions of the Spirit you can have! I've told you before that an orgasm is a spiritual experience, and I often had explosions of the Spirit at the moment of climax. It's one of the mysteries of the Spirit, but I doubt many will argue with me that when two people are loving each other freely, without inhibitions, socking it to each other with the freedom of the Spirit in His love, you feel Him there. You feel the Lord loving you! You feel the Spirit! It's a beautiful expression of His love for us and a beautiful way that we can be His love for another. (End of message from Dad.)
159. {\b \i (Mama:) }The Lord can love others through us and He can love us through others. Loving one another sexually is one of the ways the Lord's love can be manifested. He wants more of us to be the instruments of His love for each other, as He brings out clearly in the following message.
160. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:) }I don't have enough vessels, enough channels through whom to pour My love. I don't have enough hands, enough eyes, enough lips, enough arms that will hold another, that will stroke their face and tenderly touch them and speak words of love and encouragement to them.
161. I search and seek for those who will be the embodiment of My love, who are willing to represent Me before their brothers and sisters. It matters not the channel; the vessel is not important. The only requirement is that they be yielded, willing and humble. With these three qualities I am able to pour out My Spirit upon them and transform them into a perfect representation of My love for another.
162. This is My heart's desire, that all may have the love, the tenderness, the caressing, the comfort and the security of My love given through yielded, willing and humble vessels. I have need of the yielded, willing, humble vessels who will say yes to Me and freely pour out My love without measure. (End of message from Jesus.)
163. {\b \i (Mama:) }An affectionate, love-filled time of sexual sharing can minister to the flesh and the spirit, as the Lord says in this next message:
164. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:)} When you share sexually, it's also a spiritual lovemaking, for the flesh and the spirit are connected. You may not think that having love-up with someone physically makes much difference, but it does. It makes a big difference, because you open yourself up to each other and you come together physically and spiritually. It's a oneness both in body and spirit, and with Me. For this reason it is so important that you share amongst yourselves, that you all become married to each other, that you become one Bride together. (End of message from Jesus.)
165. {\b \i (Mama:) }Those that are lonely have a need for love, attention and fellowship. Although they have needs other than just sex, having a time of sexual sharing can greatly help alleviate some of the pain of their loneliness. Here is a message from the Lord about the lonely. When you read this, remember that one of our goals for 1998 is to have fewer lonely people in the Family. (See ML #3160:220-240, GN 765.)
166. {\b \i (Jesus speaking:)} So many are lonely, so many are destitute, so many are thirsting for the waters of My love, for the streams of affection that I would pour upon them! Yet they have not, because there are not those who are willing to give. So give, I say. Give, and your reward will be great.
167. Use the love that I have put in your heart, and use your broken heart to shed My love on others. Use your hands to touch them with My love, use your tears to understand their tears, and use your longing for love to fill another's loneliness. As you warm others with your love, so will you also be warmed. (End of message from Jesus.)
Living the Law of Love Fully Supplies More than Just Sex!
168. {\b \i (Mama:) }So as you can see, practicing the sexual side of the Law of Love can help to fill a number of needs besides the need for sex. Sometimes the other needs people have are not so apparent, and it's not always easy to tell the need by outward appearances. Outwardly someone may not seem to be in need, either sexually or otherwise, but there may be more to the story that's happening behind the scenes in the spirit. This is why in sharing sexually with others, as with everything else, you should pray and ask the Lord for His guidance and direction. You need to ask the Lord to show you what the true need is--what His will is in the matter. He can show you what each person you minister to needs, and He can help you to see much more deeply than if you were to judge simply by what outward appearance tells you.
169. The freedom to share sexually is a special and unique gift from the Lord to the Family, one which He meant to be used as a tool of love, as a manifestation of His love, as a vehicle for His Spirit of love, and He wants us to use it as such. He wants us to use this gift, the freedom He's given us, to minister His love to one another, and in doing so, to receive His blessings.
170. The most important principle we must remember in all of this is love--love in action, love which is manifested "in deed and in truth!" It's our duty before the Lord to show love and help others to feel loved. Dad said, "The greatest need of all is love" (ML #529:18). But he also points out that, "There are many, many more ways you can show love besides sex" (ML #648:38). As I explained in detail in Part 1 of this series, it's a common misunderstanding in the Family to think of the Law of Love as having only to do with sex. Though it does include sex, it goes way beyond just sex. I hope you have now come to understand that.
171. On the other hand, sex is a need--an important need--especially for men. As Dad said:
172. A normal man's greatest physical need is sexual love. The need for love is a spiritual need--real love. But love must be manifested in works--"faith that worketh through love"! (Gal.5:6). It must be physically shown if it is real love, right? It has to be expressed in some way, and a man simply likes his woman's love expressed in sex almost above all (ML #529:24,19).
173. Although women like sex, their need for it generally isn't as great as a man's. Dad said:
174. A woman needs love expressed in a much greater variety of ways than mere sex or the bed. A woman's needs and her need of love is much more complex than a man's, and her major need of his love's expression is not sex nor the bed--that's only part of it. The greatest need of most women is for a man's love expressed in his security, provision, and protection. A woman needs love expressed in these ways most of all (ML #529:26).
175. Elsewhere Dad said, "Most women would rather have the affection and the cuddles and the kisses than even the sex! In other words, they want evidence of genuine love!" (ML #2320:14). Of course, women like and need sex as well, but they also need signs of love that are not just sexual.
176. God made sex. He made it a need. He gave us the freedom to be able to fill that need without sin. He urges us through His Word to fill one another's needs: "Whoso seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him? My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth!" (1Jn.3:17,18).
What If It Hurts to Share?--Good Hurt vs. Bad Hurt!
177. One of the main prerequisites for partaking of the sexual side of the Law of Love is that the activity you engage in hurts no one. When Dad presented the sexual side of the Law of Love, he gave guidelines for implementing it. One of those guidelines stated that any such activity should harm no one. Quite a number of you have written asking about this point. This question arises when your mate shares with someone and it's very difficult for you, you have to fight against jealousy, and it does hurt. Does this mean that your mate shouldn't share because you're hurt by it, when according to the principles of the Law of Love no one is supposed to be hurt?
178. Sharing the one you love the most on Earth with someone else can be very difficult and a tremendous sacrifice. Giving and sacrificing is usually difficult; it costs something, and sometimes it just plain hurts. But this sacrificial type of hurt is not what Dad was talking about when he said it should hurt no one. Dad loved me very much and it was never easy for him to let me share sexually with others, either with the men in the Family or with those I witnessed to when FFing. When talking about this, Dad said:
179. It is not always easy, and sometimes it hurts you!--I know, because I've done it, and I have suffered the agonies of Gethsemane over it, and the agony of God seeing His little lamb crucified on a cross for the salvation of others! But it was worth it! "For afterward it yielded the peaceable fruit of righteousness to them which were exercised thereby." Godly hurt, sacrifice, and suffering to help others are good for us.--It's the harmful hurt to others that does the damage. That's the difference between selfish lust and sacrificial love! (ML #302C:23).
180. {\b \i (Mama:) }Dad was making a differentiation between Godly hurt, sacrifice and suffering, which a person chooses to undergo, and harmful hurt which is imposed on you by others. The interesting thing is that he said this in "The Law of Love," which is the same Letter in which he said no one should be hurt by your actions. Obviously he was talking about harmful hurt, not sacrificial hurt, when he said no one should be hurt. Here's something else Dad said on the subject when he was talking about his allowing me and even encouraging me to share sexually with others:
181. Jesus got hurt on the cross, but He did it willingly and He did it of His Own desire to save us. So [EDITED: "sharing Mama"] may have hurt me sometimes in a way, because it was a sacrifice, but it was a sacrifice of love. David said, "I will not offer unto the Lord of that which doth cost me nothing!" (2Sam.24:24). I'm not going to give the Lord something that doesn't hurt me or is no sacrifice and costs me nothing. I've given the Lord of that which cost me a great deal!
182. So if the husband has done it willingly [EDITED: "given his wife to another man"], and has done it in love, even if it might hurt a little, then he will receive his reward because he did it in love. If the wife did it in love sacrificially, unselfishly in love for him, for another man, she will receive her reward; she did it in love (ML #647:41-43).
183. {\b \i (Mama:) }I'm going to share some quotes from the Letter "The Men Who Play God," which was a talk Dad gave to the men whose wives were FFing in Tenerife. It's a very touching, heartfelt talk about the sacrifice of sharing the one you love with someone else. Although Dad was talking to the men in the Home at that time, it applies equally to you men and women who share your mates or loved ones with others today. As you'll see, Dad was well acquainted with the sacrificial hurt that occurs when the one you love is in the arms of another. But the key is that it's sacrificial hurt--it's hurt that you have chosen to endure out of your love for another, and that sacrificial hurt is part of the Law of Love. Dad says:
184. That strange blue way you feel sometimes--if you feel a little heartbroken, if you feel a little sad, if you feel a little heartache there [DELETED] (weeps) [DELETED] then you know how God felt when He sent Jesus to die on the cross for us! Jesus was not the only one who suffered! If anything, maybe God suffered more to see His Own Son dying in that cruel, horrible way! To be separated from Jesus for a while. He was with the Father in Heaven all that time before, but then He had to be separated from Him for a while to give Him time to come down here and live with us and be crucified for us that we could be saved!
185. How do you think God felt? You don't hear much about that from the preachers, do you? You don't hear much about that in the churches. They pass over God's suffering like it's nothing! You say, "Well, He loved the world, so He must have enjoyed it!" Do you really think He enjoyed it? Do you think God really enjoyed giving Jesus like that? Now come on, let's be honest! It hurt! It hurt!
186. It hurts every time! Fellows, I know how you feel because I've been through it more than you have! I've gone through it more than you, and I know how it hurts! Those minutes, those hours she spends away from you that you will never have back again! Those words, a conversation she's sharing with somebody else that you'll never hear unless she tells you all about it. A part of you has gone and has been given away that you'll never get back again--at least not in this life. But it takes that kind of sacrifice to do it!
187. Maria says sometimes when she comes back from being to bed with another man, "Honey, you seem a little cold, you're a little cool; you're almost like you're sometimes a little hard." Well, girls, how do you think Jesus felt when He was on the cross? Jesus felt that God had deserted Him! He said, "My God, My God! Why hast Thou forsaken Me?" Sometimes some of you girls may feel that way, like your husband is sometimes a little cool toward you afterward.
188. Something has happened and he's a little hurt, or he's a little sad, and he's not quite as enthusiastic in his affection for a little while because he's got what I call the "FF blues." Have you ever had the FF blues, boys? Come on, boys, how many of you have had the FF blues at some time or other? Well, did you know God had the FF blues when He had to send Jesus to die for us and be separated from Him all that time?
189. "Well," you say, "they fellowshipped in the Spirit!" Well, you can say that too about your own wife lying down there in bed with some other man: "Well, I'm still fellowshipping with her in the spirit." But it still hurts! You still miss her in the flesh, don't you? So did God miss Jesus while Jesus was down here?--Not only half an hour, not just three hours, not even 33 hours, but 33 years! He was separated from that personal Heavenly fellowship with the Lord while Christ was here on Earth with us!
190. It seems we almost have to harden ourselves against that pain and that agony and that suffering and that heartache in order to endure it! But when it's all over, for God's sake take her back in and love her up good and tell her how much you love her and how proud of her you are, that she's willing to sacrifice everything for the Lord, amen? (ML #564:3-9, 11-16,31).
191. ({\b \i Mama:) }So obviously when Dad said in "The Law of Love" that it should hurt no one, he wasn't talking about sacrificial hurt, the kind of hurt experienced when you willingly and lovingly give your loved one to another.
192. You've read about the battles I had to fight with jealousy and possessiveness in regards to Peter traveling with Rebecca, but I chose to give. It wasn't like Peter was insisting that she go with him against my will.--And that's the difference. If you and your mate are in agreement with one of you sharing with someone, it may hurt, but it's according to the Law of Love in spite of that hurt, because you agree to be hurt. On the other hand, if your mate goes off and has sex with someone against your wishes, which hurts you, then that is not according to the Law of Love.
193. Here's how this was explained in the Charter: "All sexual activity must be governed by the 'Law of Love,' in that it is agreed upon by all the parties involved, and precautions are taken so others are not hurt by their activities." (The Charter, Sex and Affection Rules, B.)
194. The Charter goes on to say: "We need to do all we can to avoid hurting others. Of course, sometimes people are hurt regardless of the precautions we attempt to take. Let's go back to the married couple spoken of before: The wife is planning to share with the single brother, and though the husband gave his agreement, it is still possible that the husband might be hurt.--He might experience some jealousy, or generally find it difficult to share his wife with someone else. However, if, because he believes in the Law of Love, he consents to be hurt, in a sense, by agreeing that his wife should share with a brother in need, then this is acceptable; in fact, commendable. That's the sacrificial side of the Law of Love and of sharing." (The Charter, Sex and Affection Rules, B, para.7 of the explanation.)
195. So when it states that no one should be hurt by practicing the sexual side of the Law of Love, it does not mean that if any hurt occurs that the act isn't being done in love, because it's likely that some sacrificial hurt will occur. The hurt that Dad was talking about--which is not in accordance with the Law of Love--is harmful, selfish hurt, caused by acts of selfishness, deception or lust instead of love. Sacrificial hurt is acceptable under the Law of Love; harmful hurt is not.
When Sharing Is
Not
a Sacrifice
196. Because so much emphasis has been placed on the sacrificial side of the Law of Love, it raises the question that if you share with someone and it's not a sacrifice, is it still in accordance with the Law of Love? The answer to that question is yes. The sexual side of the Law of Love does not have to be all sacrifice. It is acceptable to have sexual sharing in cases where there is no sacrifice involved. Let's see what the Word says about this. In "The Law of Love" Dad stated:
197. Have you got enough love to be trusted with enough liberty to live life to the full? The answer is up to you: Can you handle this new toy safely so as to bring joy and pleasure to yourself and others around you without endangering anyone or harming anyone or infringing on anyone else's freedom and others' rights? (ML #302C:5,6).
198. Dad was saying that the Law of Love can be used to bring joy and pleasure to yourself and others--of course with the stipulation that you aren't endangering anyone, harming anyone, or infringing on the rights and freedom of others. So sexual sharing, even for pleasure, is allowed--in fact, it can be inspiring and fulfilling--providing it remains within the boundaries of the Charter and the Law of Love.
199. This question of sexually sharing when it is not a sacrifice was addressed as follows in "Questions and Answers on Sex, Freedoms and Relationships!":
200. Although we have been emphasizing the main reason and purpose for which the Lord gave us these liberties--to enable us to sacrificially and lovingly help and meet others' needs--the Lord can also use the grace and freedom we receive under His Law of Love to meet our own needs as well. For example, if two people have a mutual need, if they want to love each other and are hurting no one else in the process, the Law of Love can give them the liberty to do so. (Providing they are of legal age!)
201. So the implementation of the Law of Love does not always necessarily have to be totally sacrificial. Two people may have a need, and it may not be a sacrifice on either party's part to meet the needs of the other. Or it could be a sacrifice for one of them, whereas for the other there may not be any sacrifice involved at all. But there's nothing wrong with this. It's still a tool in the Lord's hands to help His children, to meet their needs, to draw them close to each other, etc.
202. But in such cases, when properly applied, the Law of Love will still bear good fruit--whether it's sacrificial for both parties, one party or neither party. If it's bringing forth good fruit in fellowship, in closeness and communication, in meeting each other's needs, then the Lord is using it to help and satisfy His children and to keep them happy and content in His service. If it is used properly, in real love, then it will benefit the Lord's work by thus benefiting His workers (ML #2718:104-106, Lifelines 20).
203. Although sometimes you might share sexually with someone and there's no sacrifice on your part, you are still giving. You're giving of yourself and your love to another. You're giving them the Lord's love. It may not be sacrificial, but it is still giving. So, as you can see, within the Law of Love it is perfectly acceptable to have sexual fellowship with others without it necessarily having to be a sacrifice.
204. This is probably good news for you who are single and unattached. But I understand that this probably isn't a very welcome subject to bring up for those of you who battle jealousy. If you're jealous, it is naturally easier to share your mate or lover with someone when you consider that it's more of a sacrifice for him or her, and you feel your mate is mainly doing it for the other person.
205. Of course, even if any of us has a date with someone primarily because the other person needs it, there is still sweet satisfaction in it for us and we partake of the joy of the Spirit by knowing that we're helping someone and being a channel of the Lord's love. That's a very precious privilege. And because we go out of our way to love someone else and supply their needs, the Lord in turn blesses us and He usually makes it an enjoyable time for both people involved.
206. Now that kind of "sacrificial sharing" is usually not too hard to accept or bear, even if you battle jealousy. But when your mate or lover has dates and there is a definite attraction on one or both sides, that's when it's likely to be much more difficult for you. You might even be tempted to want to clamp down on such sharing, using the excuse that "it's not sacrificial" or "there's no need." I sympathize with those of you who battle jealousy. I understand the struggle. I know there is a tendency for your jealous reactions to be intensified under such circumstances, but I encourage you to please try to step out and allow your mate or lover to share even when it's not sacrificial, and I'm pretty sure you'll find that he or she will love and appreciate you more as a result!
207. Not only that, but you'll also reap the benefits of the Lord's many blessings, greater unity, the appreciation of the one you're giving to, more freedom of the Spirit, and lots of important lessons learned as a result of your fighting and persevering to victory! If you're willing to make this sacrifice, even though difficult, the Lord will be so proud of you! And so will I!
208. A word of caution to you who are mated to or going steady with someone who has jealousy battles: You will need to be very prayerful, careful, and loving when sharing, but particularly so when there is an attraction on one or both sides, or if for some other reason it's not "sacrificial." Please try to be very understanding of and very reassuring to your loved one. How you handle the situation can make a very big difference in how your mate or lover reacts. For example, I suggest you start out slowly. Don't be demanding of your mate (or boyfriend or girlfriend), don't make your dates with others too long or come back past the agreed-upon time, and if you do happen to come back late--in which case it should be unavoidable--I advise that you explain honestly and apologize right away. Don't be overly affectionate with those you're close to in front of your mate or lover. (But don't totally ignore them either. Just act naturally.) Remember, your mate (or boyfriend or girlfriend) is doing their best to be loving and giving, and allowing you the freedom you want so you can share the Lord's love with others, but don't push it or expect too much too fast, or you might find your loved one's generosity wearing thin.
209. I'll address other practical tips and specifics regarding sharing, and the emotions, battles and relationships that can result, in later GNs in this series. So if you're still wondering about some things, please be patient. I also want to remind you that as you begin to put this counsel into practice you'll want to take your questions to the Lord. Hear from Him specifically and frequently regarding your dates, any problems that come up, how you should react and see things, what you should do and with whom, etc. He's your personal Shepherd, and if you go to Him in desperate prayer and hear from Him in prophecy, He'll give you the guidance you need and help you to have wisdom and Spirit-led reactions that will enable you to live the Law of Love in a loving, caring way.
210. Thank you so much, my dear ones, for taking these important messages from the Lord to heart. Each time I see you receive, accept, and yield to the Lord's New Wine, I feel so happy. It also gives me confidence, knowing that in reward for your obedience and the vacuum you create to receive His seeds, the Lord will continue to pour forth His truth abundantly. God bless you, dear Family! Peter and I are praying for you. We're so proud of you and know that the Lord is going to help you with these big changes and challenges.
Much love and prayers,
Mama
Copyright (c) 1998 by The Family
