HomeARC ML 0952 14
RUTHIE'S FURTHER REACTIONS TO DAD'S LETTERS & HO'S CONFESSION Asia, 17/12/80 DO 952-14
Dearest Dad, Maria & Peter,
PTL! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! We arrived back in Asia yesterday night--Ho, Esther, five of the children & I--& have all really felt we're where we're supposed to be!--More on that later.
I'VE BEEN READING THROUGH ALL THE LETTERS IN THE NEW MAGAZINE, & they have been a tremendous help in our recent dealings, especially "Freedom from Fear" & "The Illuminati" & especially your phone call, Dad, specifically on the situation here, & of which we just today picked up a copy of in our P.O. Box! Thank you so much for sending us the transcript word for word. We have been having some heavy & needed prayer sessions rebuking the Devil & all the pestering demons & that devil Peter (Esther's ex-fish) who has shown his true colours now of the devil he's been all along!
YOUR LETTERS & THE REPRINTING OF JOHN TODD'S LETTER HAS BEEN REALLY GIVING US THE CONVICTION TO REBUKE THE ENEMY & not tolerate him or his influence in any of us or the children--to fight the spiritual battle first with Jesus' help & in Jesus' Name! PTL! TTL! ILY!
IN MY LAST LETTER OF DECEMBER 12th & 13th I FINISHED MY INITIAL REACTION TO READING "PRODIGAL PRODIGIES," the reports from Emmanuel & Hannah, Keda & Yasuko & Faith & Juan. In this letter I would like to go over specific points in Letters & in your phone call to Ho, & also Ho's written apology & confession.
HO'S APOLOGY & CONFESSION (10/80 & 25/11/80): I WAS REALLY GLAD WHEN I HEARD FROM HO THAT HE WAS IN A LITTLE HOTEL ROOM, reading, praying & seeking the Lord & writing you. Although I heard almost nothing from Ho in writing during his two month trip, he phoned in each week for a few minutes to check if things were OK with us & for messages. But the Lord was faithful through reading Letters like "Listening or Lamenting", "Old Church, New Church", "Lashes of Love" especially & others to help us understand what was beginning to take place.
A LOT OF HO'S TRYING TO EXCUSE ESTHER IN THIS OCTOBER CONFESSION & take the blame on himself was that for about a week before Ho left, Esther had these long super heavy sessions with him drilling in him all he was guilty of in her situation & that he better make that clear to you. When he wrote about the part of Esther's original sins which caused her so much trouble, unbelief, bitterness & lack of faith especially about sharing & "One Wife" & about her rejection of you in the beginning of the R., I felt he was getting to the heart of the matter. "FFing & Jealousy" really applied to the situation, also "Old Church, New Church" prophecies.
HO'S SAYING THAT ESTHER WAS DOING BETTER WAS MOSTLY JUST HOPEFUL, because of the fact that before he went to Europe we all moved into the little H.K. flat together & that was the first time Esther had even wanted to be with the children in two years, but her basic spiritual problems had not yet improved.
IN HO'S APOLOGY WRITTEN FROM GREECE, 25/11/80, your comment that Ho wasn't more interested in the RDs & him following afar off are so true, sad to say. He is so easily distracted by things around him, or swayed by people wanting him to do this or that. In Malta & when Ho & I were here just the two of us in H.K. working on the Books, he was very keen on reading your Letters every day with me, & when the FF Letters & King Arthur Letters were coming out we poured over them every day & went out FFing with our Chinese printers & contacts quite often.--It's almost like Ho has to live in a situation with virtually no distractions in order to accomplish his work.
DAD, DO YOU REMEMBER A DREAM YOU HAD ABOUT HO THAT YOU SENT TO US when we were first in Hong Kong about five years ago? We have a copy but not in my current files--it was something about Ho driving a truck or bus & having engine trouble, & you gave him some warning there about Esther & the family distracting him--something to do with laundry piled under the hood. We'll have to look through Ho's files from that time as I feel this dream & warning applies, as also "Little Dog Dream" & "Sinking Boat Dream" do.
REGARDING HO'S REACTION TO "PORNO MOVIES," he has always followed your counsel & Letters in regards to sex & loves romance, candles & good clean sex. He has never been pushy for sex & always been considerate if I'm not feeling well or if I've been out FFing. The instances of him making love if I'm having a period were more frequent in the beginning of our relationship years ago, but I can't remember any instance of that at all in recent years, as he's quite content during my monthly period & I usually try to help him through it with my hand or mouth as suggested.
HO HAS NEVER EVER BEEN INTERESTED IN SEEING PORNO MOVIES OR WOULD EVEN WATCH ONE IF OFFERED. He's got too many other things on his mind, & would probably walk out if one was showing--they are so ridiculous. At the time Esther heard "PM" she did not have a total repentance or change, but she did say to me it was just the "tip of the iceberg" of what was probably coming! So you were right in that for sure!
YOUR REPLY ON THE BOTTOM OF HO'S APOLOGY WAS VERY NEEDED COUNSEL WHICH YOU EXPANDED IN YOUR PHONE CALL. If possible, Ho & I would very much like to have a copy of the RD "Warning to Ho & Esther" which I've not read yet but Ho has shared some notes about it & about the dream you had of Esther.
YOUR MERCY IN ENCOURAGING HO IN CHINA PIONEERING WAS VERY IMPORTANT. Because of ministering so much to foreigners (except when Ho & I were first here, & except for the Orientals ministered to in ESing [EDITED: "Escort Servicing"] & being influenced by that devil fish Peter, Esther had a terrible contempt for the Chinese--the same as many of the snobby English have here. I was also finding it hard to have a burden for the Chinese, except when FFing them, the Lord gave me the burden, & more recently when litnessing to them I've really seen a whole different picture! PTL! Ho has always, that I can remember, encouraged us to go out & minister to our Chinese friends & FF them faithfully, GBH.--And God help us to find a way to minister in China again, & video it for you & the Family. Seeing China has really opened our understanding more than ever to the Hong Kong & overseas Chinese & why they are the way they are. It's a whole other world in there.
I BELIEVE THE RADIO IS GOING TO BE ONE OF THE VERY BEST WAYS TO REACH INTO CHINA, here in the Southern part of China. MWM in English could have a terrific response from S. China because everyone there wants to learn English & everyone has a radio & whoever can tunes into the H.K. stations--to learn English! If later we can translate it then fine--like is now being done in Hindi--but I believe the key is still English for now, & follow up in both English & Chinese lit & Mags! The Mags Faithy sent us for their Club members are so beautiful! They can be used word for word & pic for pic! Lord make a way for us to get it on the air as soon as possible! (Amen!--Hear ye, MWM!--Dad.)
"PRODIGAL PRODIGIES": When Ho gave me this Letter to read he said that this was the most encouraging of all the Letters & reports. I read through it & felt that maybe he hadn't really taken it all in, because to me it was the heaviest Letter of all & the one that pointed out why Ho was almost a helpless, hopeless case, except for a miracle of obedience on his part. This Letter gave me a lot of insight to Ho. I have always looked for & seen in him your training, Dad, & the good things which you have passed on to him. I was always puzzled however about the quirks & irrational things in his behaviour, his strayings, lack of time in the Word & his temper & hardness with the children.
I NEVER UNDERSTOOD HOW OR WHERE HE GOT ALL THESE THINGS TILL I READ YOUR LETTER & REALISED IT WAS MOTHER'S INFLUENCE ON HIM! What a shock! But that key made all these things fall into place & gave me a greater understanding of what things he learned from you & what from Mother so as to know what to take a stand against if I see it cropping up again!
THE OTHER VERY IMPORTANT KEY TO THIS LETTER IN UNDERSTANDING HO'S BEHAVIOUR--especially in his dealings with other Family members--is the part about child prodigies & the problems they have as adults! That is so exactly true! He's had a very difficult time adjusting to the fact that he is no longer a leader over other people. When in Malta he was constantly in your words & humbled & never tried to railroad his ideas in the local Family situation. But since going off the track & forsaking GLP he's been really hard on some of the Family members here in Macau, pushing ideas & counsel on them that was not wanted or appreciated. (Since returning to H.K. he has had the opportunity & has confessed & apologised to most of these people--more on that later!)
HE IS A TERRIFIC IDEA MAN, but the trouble with that is he is always wanting to follow through on all his ideas himself instead of applying this God-given talent to carrying out your ideas! He is seeing this more clearly now too, PTL! For instance, your idea of him publishing the MO Books & working out all the details, it worked really well because he was doing your job, your idea, & using his ideas & talents in mechanical things, PR, etc., to make it happen the best he could--& it was a good job, PTL. But as soon as he follows his own ideas more than yours, he becomes, as you said, a wandering star, lost & sad, pitiful.
WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT HO'S METHODS BEING A LITTLE OUT OF LINE BECAUSE OF NOT COUNSELLING & ASKING PERMISSION IS ALSO SO TRUE. Usually when we counseled together the Lord was faithful to give us the answers, but in the last couple of years almost all of his decisions to get into System work were done & made without counseling, or in direct opposition to my counsel. We did not agree, & eventually he stopped asking me altogether because he knew I was against it.
HIS DOMINEERING SPIRIT WHEN BUSINESS IS INVOLVED, THAT MARIA BROUGHT OUT & OTHERS, IS ALSO VERY TRUE & he needs constant reminders not to be hard on people. Again, so pushy like Mother is. It all fits into place. ("Prayer for Love & Mercy" [EDITED: "No.75"], was for him.--Dad.)
I REMEMBER IN ANOTHER LETTER YOU SENT TO HO, it was a word from the Lord for him, you were asking what made Ho so hard? When & how did he get hard? Of course, it must have been with Mother, when Mother turned so rebellious & led him astray. I don't know all of the family history from those days, but that's what came to me, that Mother must have put that hardness in him--rebellion.
YES, THANK GOD FOR FAITHY WHO HAS ALWAYS BEEN SUCH A SAMPLE OF BEING EAGER FOR YOUR WORDS & BEING EAGER TO OBEY THEM! God bless her for the encouragement & inspiration she has been to so many members of the Family, to me personally so many times (my mother in the Lord! Hal! I'm so thankful!) & of course to the countless numbers she's been faithful to witness your words & the Lord's music to!
ABOUT HO DOING THE NATURAL REASONABLE THING TO DO LIKE SAUL; this is his tendency to look at things & figure them out in the natural. Even our present need for deliverance from devil-fish Peter I was getting more & more upset about the situation & the danger of it & neither Ho nor Esther could see it completely, & were suggesting this & that, till I insisted we get in prayer together immediately & rebuke the Devil & rebuke Peter in Jesus' Name & cast him & his influence out of our lives & out of H.K. completely. It was like a fight to get him to really see it is a spiritual battle that we cannot win unless we have God & Jesus & His spiritual Holy ghosts fighting for us & with us. Only God can deliver us out of this evil man's hand, & only if we obey. Ho was doing the obey part, but needed to see the need to deal with the situation first in prayer & in the spiritual realm. Then of course the Lord did not fail us & gave us the instant direction we needed! PTL! GBT!--Once we got in prayer they really did pray hard!
ANOTHER VERY IMPORTANT KEY THING THIS LETTER BROUGHT OUT WAS WHEN MARIA SAID THAT HO FELT GUILTY ABOUT HAVING ME AS A WIFE & therefore he didn't really believe in "One Wife" either. When I read this I told Ho that was really true, & he had a hard time believing it until I began to explain how I had felt all along, that I've felt Ho has always been ashamed to call me his wife. I understood that publicly it may not be the wisest thing to do in our little Catholic community in Asia, but that even privately Ho has never referred to me as his wife or called me that. I told him that this attitude had always given me a strange feeling like he was ashamed. Ho was really surprised when I told him that, because he always believed that he believed I was his wife in his heart. But Jesus & the Bible says that you have to confess it if you believe it. (Amen!--Dad.)
SO HO'S NOT BELIEVING WHAT MARIA SAID THERE BROUGHT OUT ANOTHER IMPORTANT POINT THAT I FELT I NEEDED TO DEAL WITH HIM ABOUT RIGHT THEN & THERE--that he didn't seem to receive anything Maria wrote to him or said about him! That that's maybe why he didn't do the writing on the history projects or even begin to start thinking about it, because the list of priorities came from Maria! I had to tell him right there that he had been doubting Maria's word and that he had no excuse, because from all Dad has written & from all we've heard from Maria, as well as her obvious good fruit in starting Dad & the entire Revolution & the MO Letters & the Childcare Revolution & the FFing Revolution & all the prophecies from the earliest to the most recent, that it's obvious that Maria is the one! (Amen! Hal!--D.)
MARIA'S VOICE & DIRECTION IS ONE & THE SAME AS DAD'S & SHE IS ONE OF THE ENDTIME PROPHETS. She is the one to carry on for Dad "When I'm Gone," & she has been a prophetess to us all along even if she doesn't realise it fully herself. Dad has said so & I believe it. And Ho needed to wake up to this other rebellion & get himself straightened out with Maria right now & apologise to her & follow everything she has said to him, & believe it if he really expects to get healed & helped & stay in the Family & in tune with the Lord! Amen! This one point got me hopping mad! (Amen! Maria's word is mine.)
--MARIA IS THE ONE, "THE SHEPHERDESS," THE PROPHETESS, & ALWAYS HAS BEEN FROM THE BEGINNING, & will lead us through till Jesus comes, as the Lord showed Dad! PTL!--Ho listened to this & I hope & pray received it all, & I feel & told him so, that he definitely needs to write an apology to Maria & begin obeying her & be faithful & loyal to her now & always!
UNTIL I WENT OVER THIS LETTER WITH HO HE DIDN'T REALLY REALISE WHAT YOU WERE SAYING IN "PRODIGAL PRODIGIES," that he was really falling away just like Deborah & Jethro, Mother, Rachel & Emanuele & Tim who have gone the full "DDDB" & actually betrayed you! He didn't realise that he was already going crazy--but thank God for your Letter--it surely woke me up to why he seemed unbalanced in some ways! And what to guard against! It really began to scare him when he saw what was really in that Letter--and he needed a good scare to help him get desperate enough to get back in line & never stray again, DV!--And God is willing if Ho will just simply obey. It's so easy to obey, but so hard when you stray! (Amen! GB & help him--& you! ILY!)
THANK YOU FOR YOUR ENCOURAGEMENT TO ME & YOUR FAITH IN ME. I have made some bad mistakes in all this too, & I don't want to get lifted up now when trying to help heal the situation. Thank God Faithy straightened me out & helped me know how to help straighten this situation out now by following her sample of what & how she had to deal with me two-&-a-half years ago. I'm so grateful to her & the Lord for that time of humbling & correction! Thank you Dad for your final prayer about Ho that the Lord would get his mind & heart back--He's answering now as Ho obeys!
Love always, Your Ruthie XOXOXOX!
(Excerpts from Ruthie's 18/12/80 letter:)
SOMETIMES I THINK HO HAS A FEAR OF BEING DISCOVERED FOR WHO HE REALLY IS, where I've always known Faithy to be happy to be known who she is & who her father is in situations where it would be acceptable. This fear of exposure has hindered him & Esther too in being free enough to litness & distribute the MO Letters I think, or maybe it's the other way around--not wanting to litness has given him a fear of being known he's your son. Ashamed of your words!? I've always known Faithy & Aaron to be full of conviction about giving out MO Letters & distributing your words!
I BELIEVE BOTH HO & ESTHER NEED TO GIVE UP THIS SILLY SECURITY TRIP which in their case has become extreme & a hangover from the old days, & go out litnessing themselves & with the children. I say themselves, because it's good not to hide behind the children! Recently I've been litnessing with the children, but instead of directing them where to go, I went first & litnessed & asked for donations & it really showed me an important lesson of being a sample & leading the sheep by example! My little partners were always the lit shiners of the day when we were out together. PTL!--And God bless our helper David who shared with me & gave me the conviction to do it! It works!
I KNOW THAT SOME SECURITY IS NEEDED, BUT HO IS WAY OVER HERE, a missionary on a distant field, & there's no reason why he can't get the lit out too & teach his kids, & especially Esther! It's so much fun! And we finally started meeting a lot of people to lead to the Lord on the spot instead of working over unreceptive fish for years! Ha!
KEDA & YASUKO'S REPORT WAS A VERY ACCURATE SUMMARY OF THE SITUATION IN HONG KONG & ESTHER'S REACTION TO THE "PORNO MOVIES" LETTER! God bless them--they are so loving & encouraging, even during chastisement, really the Lord's love so strong through them! I love them both so much because they're like you, Dad, & like the Lord. The things Esther shared with Keda after reading "PM" & having a week to read other Letters & pray about it were just the same old lies & Enemy's thoughts she'd clung to over the years. She appeared to break & cry & get a word from the Lord--maybe the Lord really found some opening to come through--but she hadn't yet forsaken these old things, just as Keda thought. Her turning to the "Mothers of God" & "God's Witches" Letters in regards to Peter, & not being led of the Lord to do so, was also very right on.
KEDA MENTIONED THAT HER ACCEPTANCE OF THE LETTER BEING SHALLOW WAS REALLY RIGHT. Keda saw quite clearly that the crux of the matter was that Esther needed to forsake the bitterness of the past, & the other things attached to it. GBH! They had so much wisdom & insight from the Lord in evaluating that meeting. PTL!
ON DAD'S PHONE CALL WITH HO, 4/12/80: Dear Dear Dad & Maria, God bless you & thank you for this final warning & ultimatum & last spanking you gave Ho. I was desperately praying every day you'd somehow get in contact with him, because I knew if you did not that Ho would be beyond help & out completely. I know it must have been a terrible strain on you, Dad, to have made this call, & thank you Maria for letting him, & we know it is an absolute exception to the rule.
WHEN HO ARRIVED BACK IN H.K. HE STILL HADN'T ABSORBED IT ENOUGH but was really listening & tuning in to it. He listened to it several times & made long notes on it, as I did when I listened.
THIS PHONE CALL HAS DONE MORE TO HELP HO & ESTHER SINCE HIS RETURN THAN ANYTHING ELSE & it's exactly what they needed to hear, & what I needed to hear too! GBY for always being so kind & concerned about the little things, if Ho was warm & being careful not to get sick. You are the true shepherd in Jesus' Love.--Ruthie.
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1. (PTL! GBY all!--And help you pull through & make it!--And He will if you let Him! He loves you & you're still His sons! Searching for lost or straying sheep is a long haul, rough & rugged, but worth it! PTL! GBY! Thanks for all your help, Ruthie.--ILY as always & am counting on you to help pull'm through!--Tks! We're praying for you all.--GBAKY!--Love, Dad.)
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